Something you should never do is revisit someone you once admired. Whether that someone is a childhood hero or just that guy you met last summer and kind of liked because you will have built up an imagine of that person during your time apart, a persona of sorts. The more time spent apart form this person, the more distorted that persona will become. Their flaws will seep out of your memory until all that remains is what was pure and good and admirable about them. Until all they are is a perfect memory.
It’s the best feeling ever.
Thinking back to someone you once knew and viewing them as a god of sorts is rather incredible. It makes you feel as though your time spent with them was perfect. Whenever you’re feeling low, all you need to do is trace your mind back to when that person was in your life, and like magic, you’re happy again. Because not only is that person a good memory, but they’re a safe haven. When everything else is wrong, they are right.
And that is why you can never meet them again.
They are not pure, they are not great, they are not all good, they are not perfect. They are not a haven, they are human. When you meet them again and you realise that, everything they once were to you is tainted. Poisoned by the imperfections you’d forgotten about. Then every single time you try to go back to when your memory of them was pure, all you can see is what’s wrong with them, and you know you’ll never get that purity back. And it sucks. It really fucking sucks.